FCS' Writings Thread Options

[Admiral FCS]

In a way to, say, improve grammar, I decided to create my own writings thread.

My writings will mainly about ZH, RA3, Star Trek, and maybe some occasional school works that I need advices/criticisms on.

Since English is not my native language, my grammar will be very much a 5-6/10 (Most mistakes are on verb tenses), and my writings wouldn't be as full of rhetoric words (Even rhetoric used me 5 seconds in dictionary) as most of the writings here have. However, it is said that "Practice makes perfection", so I will try to practice a lot.

So, let's hope that you can have no problem reading my writings.

------------------------------
USS Sol, NCC-88011
Sol class (prototype) Deep space mission starship

Length: 725.3 meters
Beam: 454.6 meters
Height: 198.7 meters
Weight: 5,800,000 metric tons
Power Plant: 1x 2000+ Cochrane warp core, 2 nacelles; 4 impulse drive systems; Starfleet prototype IWD (Intergalatic warp drive)
Performance:
-Warp 10+ capable
-Ablative armor installed
-Regenerative shield generators
-Type-XY phasers (Semi-prototype)
-Prototype miniature Nadion pulse cannon

The USS Sol NCC-88011 is the newest Starfleet vessel, introduced in 2386. The Sol class' prototype, it features some of the most advanced Federation and Starfleet technological advancements.

The Sol was originally designed as a larger relative of the Prometheus class: A deep space warship with 4 warp nacelles, multi-vector assault mode and regenerative shielding. As the long missing USS Voyager came back from its 7-year trek in the Delta Quadrant, however, several new technologies was analyzed and implanted for the ship, rendered the design to be changed, requiring the cancellation of multi-vector assault mode and use the traditional design of saucer-secondary hull-2 nacelles design.

The Sol is about 30 meters longer than the Sovereign class, although the two looks rather similar. The main difference between the two is the Sol's Modular Bridge Escapement Pod, MBEP: The bridge module is outfitted with its own impulse drive, power support and all essential systems, allowing the bridge module to separate from the saucer section, and the escapement of all senior officers on board.

As far as similarity goes, that's about it. The Sol is featured with latest Starfleet technology.

On the mobility side, the USS Voyager contributed greatly to the Sol's transwarp capability. With their experiments of regular transwarp, (Attempted by Lt. Thomas Eugene Paris) attempts of outfitting quantum slipstream drive and the successful usage of Borg transwarp coils, Starfleet Engineering Division, with 4 years of experiments, managed to create and install its own IWD, the Intergalactic Warp Drive. The IWD creates a quantum slipstream in the subspace, allowing the Sol to cross the Threshold, although the main drive is still experimental, and can only work continuously for 15 minutes at maximum. The almost distortionless quantum channel, however, means that 5 minutes is theoretically enough to cross the Alpha Quadrant.

On the offensive/defensive scale, the Sol could potentially be the most powerful Starfleet starship. The main armaments are twelve Type-XY phaser banks. XY phasers have a high resonance frequency, thus has greater chances of overloading enemy shield generator. There are five torpedo bays on the ship, equipped with photon, quantum and gravimetric torpedos. The transphasic torpedo, brought to the current timeline by an alternate timeline Kathryn Janeway, is still being analyzed, but could see its potential use by the 2390's. The new subspatial torpedo, developed as a joint project between Federation membership scientists, is also being readied for equipment: The new torpedo is capable of achieving warp speed, and locks onto a target even at warp speed. The torpedo attacks by a remotely controlled miniature warp core, dealing enormous damage. On the defensive side, the ship's hull is made of polyduramic metal with 7/1000 Sirillium added, and ablative armor can be deployed. The ship's shield is newly developed, requiring much hotter temperature to overload, thus works longer, and it is regenerative.

The most unique feature of the Sol, though, is the Nadion-pulse cannon. The Nadion-pulse cannon was designed and built during the Dominion War, and was armed on at least planet Tezwa, as a backup base for the Starfleet in dire situations. After the Tezwa Crisis, Starfleet Command saw the potential of using it as a starship weapon, and ordered that a miniature version be developed. With failures and partial successes for 7 years, the cannon is finally ready for action on 2385. The cannon acts much like a transphasic torpedo: Millions of phases of frequency would overload the shield emitter and the resonance would be powerful enough to destroy a Klingon Negh'var Battlecruiser, unshielded, in seconds. The main downside of the pulse cannon is that the power drain is enormous, requiring energy from engine systems and armor systems, so it can only be used as a first strike weaponry.

The Sol's 100% operation efficiency crew is 800. Although not designed as the replacement of Galaxy class, it is able to carry 300 extra occupants(with quarters), and is luxurious by Starfleet standards. There are 5 holodecks throughout the ship, and gymnasiums, mess halls, bars and other entertainment services are available. The ship also has two schools and one kindergarten, and a small database is enough to for a civilian to become an able Academy cadet.

The Sol was christened on May 2nd, 2386, and is currently the most advanced ship in the Federation Starfleet.

This post has been edited by Admiral FCS: 17 Jun 2009, 5:22

[Admiral FCS]

-------------------------
The exploration of Gamma Quadrant
USS Sol, NCC-88011

Recorded in this log was the exploration of Gamma Quadrant by USS Sol of Federation Starfleet. In its five-year mission, twenty percent of the Quadrant was explored, and dozens of new lifeforms were discovered.

NOTE: Ship's log is noted in Earth year/month/day format.

----------------
Captain's Log, May 2nd 2387
This is Captain Harry Kim, recording our first log in the Gamma Quadrant.

The Sol departed from DS9 on 0900, and we are in the Gamma Quadrant by 1200. As soon as we exited the wormhole, Dominion forces surrounded us. We hailed them with no response, and we were forced to charge our shields, raise our armor and charge the weapons. I ordered Ensign Harrison to send out a subspace transmission declaring our peaceful intent, and whether the Dominion listened or not, they gave us a route, though not unconditional: A Dominion battleship follows us closely, and I can see it from my ready room window just now.

Our first pile of data came from the Idran system: The FGC-1215 supergiant/Idran sun is stable as of yet, although should it go supernova, we wouldn't survive the blast. The system consists of 6 planets; Idran I through VI. Idran I is a small class K planet with a minimum atmosphere, and there is a large deposit of Dilithium around 50 kilometers down the surface; Idran II is a Demon-class planet; Idran III is another Demon-class planet, with two class H moons; Irdan IV is within the ecosphere, and is a class L planet with several asteroid moons; Idran V is a Jovian planet with a elaborate ring system like Saturn, though its surface looks like Neptune; Idran VI is a class T gas-giant. There is also an asteroid belt outside the almost-oval orbit of Idran VI, separating the system from the Idran Meteorite Cloud.

We are now heading towards a new unknown world, like 16 years ago; like Captain Admiral Janeway, I will bring my crew home. End log.
----------------

This post has been edited by Admiral FCS: 15 Jun 2009, 8:02

[Shock]

You're doing well with the writing. A lot of techno babble but I don't mind it as I also love the senseless Star Trek 'everything is possible' technologies

So, your IWD is essentially a hyperdrive + slipstream? Or in other terms, a hyperdrive inside the function of a hyperdrive? Would be nice if you could elaborate that a little bit in your story.

I do fear that by creating a very potent ship (in star trek stories, the ship itself is very important), you did not really make things more interesting to write a plot about. Beware that the more powerful the enemies are, the more interesting you can make your plot. However you created ''the most advanced ship of the Alpha Quadrant''. It's ofcourse nice to write about how the Federation Ship kicks everybody else's ass, but as the Mary Sue theory precribes, it will go boring.

So if you really want to make a long Star Trek story in the likes of the Voyager journey, I would suggest not making your characters so powerful.

[Admiral FCS]

Thanks for the suggestion, it will be fixed.

To answer your question, yes, the IWD = Hyperdrive, although it creates a quantum slipstream instead of jumping into hyperspace.


This post has been edited by Admiral FCS: 17 Jun 2009, 5:21

[Shock]

Well the general lore behind a hyperdrive is that the ship passes into something Star Trek defines as subspace, and travels in there because the distances between subspace anchor points with real space are hypothetically ''way smaller'' in subspace. But in your story, I imply that you tell us that the Sol is using Quantum Slipstream propulsion inside subspace?

[Admiral FCS]

The IWD creates a quantum slipstream, which is inside the subspace. The field created will "push" the ship through the subspace with a speed much greater than regular warp drives.

[Admiral FCS]

--------------------------
Captain's Log, May 18th 2387
The Dominion battleship is still following us, and when we exit warp, they exit warp too. Speaking of tracker.

We arrived at one of the Dominion's closest outpost near the Wormhole, the Wak'ha System. This system is a binary red dwarf system, and contains only three planets. Wak'ha I is a Demon-class planet, and like the one where the crew was duplicated, this one contains a rich deposit of deuterium, but that's about it on its usefulness. With the Delta Flyer II class, AKA Hazardous Space Surveyor class, we've managed to land on the planet and surveyed it; the planet has a extremely high atmospheric pressure, with a strong electromagnetic disruption. Dust storms constantly reshapes the planet, with several extraordinarily high mountains on the surface. The average temperature of the planet is around six hundred seventy five degrees kelvin. The planet has a rotational period of sixteen hours, and revolutional period of around three hundred Earth days. The Dominion seems not so interested on this planet.

When we attempted to land on Wak'ha II, the Battleship fired a warning shot. Without a choice, we can only orbit the planet, and the sensors recorded the following; a class-M planet with three major landmasses and four small landmasses; 70% water; a Dominion population of 10 billion; at least ten land-based shipyards and at least twenty Polaron Multiphasic Beam + Quantum Torpedo anti-orbital defence stations. The planet also has a natural moon, almost the same as to Earth's Moon. The planet is strangely very similar to Earth, the human crew concluded, especially Ensign Harrison, helmsman and Commander Archer, first officer. Our attempts to land the planet was not successful, to the dismay of human crewmembers.

Wak'ha III is rather a dwarf planet, class L. This planet is extremely rich in deuranium and dilithium, so the Dominion has around fifteen mining colonies and some shipyards on the planets. The Dominion didn't even let us get into a high orbit range, so we had to only bypass the planet.

Long range sensor shows that a large nebula is surrounding the system, and we will attempt to survey it. End log.
-------------------------

[Admiral FCS]

BATTLE OF THE NORTH SEA, TEASER

INS Nakagama

Captain Hikaru Mitsubishi was an old and wise man. At the age of twenty, he joined the Imperial Navy as a young crewman, first serving the Naval Defence Forces, then climbing higher up, commanding various class of Imperial naval ships, such as the Yari-class scout submarines, then Yamahata-class missile destroyer, befor finally becoming the commanding officer of the INS Nakagama, one of the newest Shogun-class battleships. Commanding a Shogun-class battleship is the highest honor of a Japanese man; he needs experience, presteige, and the trust of both his superiors and his fellow officers and crew.

The Nakagama departed from the White Turtoise, the operation base of the Imperial Expedition Force, with a course due south to the Allied Hamburg AFB. The cold and dark night provided perfect night fot the invasion fleet, with four Shogun-class battleships, surrounded by twenty eight Tsumani-class AMBT, and forteen SeaWing AeroSubs, providing air cover. Intels provided by spies inside the Allied Forces declared that the Allied will defend to the last man. In the dimly lit Captain's Ready Room, Mitsubishi lied on his sides, a standard issue Navy blanket kept him warm. On the wall, the photo of him as a Captain and his son, as an Air Force Captain, stood together.

[GDIZOCOM]

wow,that's a lot of writings and good work

[Admiral FCS]

BATTLE OF THE NORTH SEA, CHAPTER THREE-ONE
Above INS Nakagama

The 304th Tengu squadron just arrived to guard the airs for the advancing formation, with nine planes in the squadron. Captain Jusan Mitsubishi and his co-pilot, First Lieutenant Isoru Sato, was jokingly chatting, since the all-purpose radar showed no Allied aerial targets in range. The "airphibic" mech has a mini refrigirator, a heater and a mini washroom, providing comfort for the pilots. The pilots all talked about the same topics; home, offspring, loved ones, or for the unmarried ones, babes. Isoru just got a cup of tea, when the radar showed three large Allied targets coming in. The computer automatically sounded an red alert, and Isoru almost dropped his tea to the floor.

"This is Captain Mitsubishi, we're going in. Targets are three Century Carpet Bombers, 2'o clock. Engage!"The Tengus opened up their afterburners, and seconds later, the engines bursted out blue fires, the wings slided backwards, and like an arrow, they cross through the skies.

"Mitsubishi here, fan out, three per bomber, attack from 12'o clock!""Hai, attacking!"

Red plasma bursts shot out of the gun barrels, and in seconds, teared the bombers apart, although the bomber crew escaped with enforced American escape pods.

"This is Captan Mitsubishi to the squadron, targets eliminated, return to escort positions.""Roger, returning to escort.""Acknoledged, Mitsubishi out."The Tengus raced back to the formation, protecting it from Allied air attacks.
-------------------------
For anyone wondering, this is Chapter Three in the original, link to the FS writings thread is here.


This post has been edited by Admiral FCS: 7 Jul 2009, 8:15